The discussions re designed to help people define the differences in perspective. Understanding the competing interests as to disputed issues helps resolve the divorce.

The participants, not the attorneys, determine the nature and scope of the dispute. The mediator helps the participants define the issues and make informed decisions . . . developing mutually acceptable agreements within a confidential setting.

Mediation promotes communication and cooperation while minimizing uncertainty and delays inherent in the adversarial court system.

Mediation is scheduled at your convenience.

The Procedure

When No Lawyers Are Present
Sometimes people begin mediation before they have hired an attorney and perhaps don’t intend to hire a lawyer at all. Or they have lawyers but wish to mediate without them in order to keep expenses down.

In this case, it is most important that the mediator be an experienced family law attorney in order to guide the parties through all of the issues that need to be resolved. The mediator will usually meet with the parties once or several times (depending on how complicated the case is) to help them clarify the issues, gather the necessary information, and reach agreements. Sometimes the mediator may place the parties in separate rooms and speak to them privately (called “caucusing”), if that arrangement is more conducive to settlement. When an agreement is reached, a written memorandum of understanding is prepared.

The parties are encouraged to each consult with a divorce lawyer of their own choosing for advice. They may need only an hour or two of that lawyer’s time, but it is important that they have their own counsel to confer with when they are not sure what to do about a particular issue. Independent counsel is invaluable in reviewing the written memorandum of understanding and/or or judgment to be sure it is fair, reasonable and in proper legal form. Remember, the mediator is not the attorney representing either party.

When Lawyers Are Present
Sometimes parties come to mediation after they are already involved in litigation and have exchanged all of the information they need regarding property and children. In this case, the lawyers usually come with their clients to mediation, although their presence is not required. A trial date may have already been set, but, in any event, the parties are trying to avoid a trial by reaching an agreement.

The mediator usually listens to the lawyers and clients summarize the case in a joint session and then places each side in a separate room. The mediator shuttles back and forth, talking to each side in more detail about their case, and exchanges offers. When an agreement is reached, everyone meets together again to write and sign the agreement. The lawyers later type up the agreement in more formal language. This kind of mediation session usually takes several hours.